Tuesday, September 8, 2009
A few years ago I was flipping around the TV dial and I landed on some music video show hosted by a blond who was sitting on the beach and wearing a swimsuit. She was doing the usual cheery VJ replicant patter when all of a sudden she put on a very, very serious face to introduce the new video from Robbie Williams. She warned the audience that the clip was incredibly shocking, that sensitive viewers absolutely should not watch it under any circumstances.
Naturally that got my curiosity up. I didn't know much about Williams, but I understood that he was some sort of English boy band person, like a limey version of Justin Timberlake. How shocking could this video be, really? But the VJ girl kept going on and on with the warnings, it was like she was about to show us that cursed video from The Ring or something.
So then the video started, and Williams strutted out and started to strip while all these girls were watching. The music sounded sort of Backstreet Boys-ish, the photography was slick and commercial. I wasn't shocked by it, I was bored. Were people really freaking out about Williams doing a Chippendales routine?
And then... Oh sweet Lord, what happened then. I think I actually dropped the remote on the floor.
Just like that VJ girl, I am going to warn you now that this video is incredibly shocking, that sensitive viewers absolutely should not watch it under any circumstances. And just like me, you're going to think it can't possibly be as shocking all that, and you're going to watch it. To say this is not safe for work isn't nearly strong enough. This thing isn't safe for life.
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